A friend sent me the following quote after the news of the failure of the 2nd IVF:
There are times when things look very dark to me--so dark that I have to wait even for hope. It is bad enough to wait in hope. A long-deferred fulfillment carries its own pain, but to wait for hope, to see no glimmer of a prospect and yet refuse to despair; to have nothing but night before the casement and yet to keep the casement open for possible stars; to have a vacant place in my heart and yet to allow that place to be filled by no inferior presence--that is the grandest patience in the universe. It is Job in the tempest; it is Abraham on the road to Moriah; it is Moses in the desert of Midian; it is the Son of man in the Garden of Gethsemane.
There is no patience so hard as that which endures, "as seeing him who is invisible"; it is the waiting for hope.
Thou hast made waiting beautiful; Thou has made patience divine. Thou hast taught us that the Father's will may be received just because it is His will. Thou hast revealed to us that a soul may see nothing but sorrow in the cup and yet may refuse to let it go, convinced that the eye of the Father sees further than its own.
Give me this Divine power of Thine, the power of Gethsemane. Give me the power to wait for hope itself, to look out from the casement where there are no stars. Give me the power, when the very joy that was set before me is gone, to stand unconquered amid the night, and say, "To the eye of my Father it is perhaps shining still." I shall reach the climax of strength when I have learned to wait for hope.
-George Matheson
My heart feels the vacancy of children very keenly right now. My windows look out on black skies void of stars. My cup brims with sorrow. But, somehow, I trust that this drink will nourish me; that not one star is missing; that my heart can be full of my Savior though empty of children. I trust, I hold on, I wait for hope.
(Thanks, Charissa.)
6 comments:
Beautifully said, dear. That was so encouraging to me!
That was so beautiful. I came by with a cup of earl grey and many good wishes for this cycle.
I'm glad you're liking Eyre Affair! I'm so excited someone is reading him. Let me know what you think when you get to the end. The other books in the series are good too.
Wow. That is amazing. Thanks for sharing...that is definitely a word of wisdom and encouragement.
As Job said, "Blessed be the name of the Lord."
Amy
dancingwithinfertility.blogspot.com
Beautiful, dear one. Praying for you!
A hearty 'AMEN' I give to that. What a sovereign Father we serve, Who can lead us through these valleys and come out of each one being thankful enough to be able to say, "That was worth it to know Him all the more."
What an all-encompassing, all-knowing, all-tenderloving God we serve.
My thoughts are on you and your mother's-heart.
Jessy (Katie's friend)
"My windows look out on black skies void of stars. My cup brims with sorrow. But, somehow, I trust that this drink will nourish me; that not one star is missing; that my heart can be full of my Savior though empty of children. I trust, I hold on, I wait for hope."
This is utterly amazingly put. I look forward and hope and pray that whatever the Lord might bring across my path, I will be able to trust when there's no (earthly) reason to. To hope when hope has gone into hibernation and left a trail of brokenness behind it. Thank you for sharing this.
I only pray I can be as faithful to produce fruit with the pruning of Infertility like you have.
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