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7.20.2006

A Letter...

...to my child(ren) yet unborn (maybe even yet unconceived),

I want you to know how God is working as I wait for you. It feels like I've been waiting for a very long time. I want you so much! - to snuggle you, to sing and talk to you, to nurture you, to see your daddy make you giggle. Mostly, though, I want to see you grow up to know Jesus.

Years ago, I wanted you so badly and though God would give you to me right away. But God, who is good and wise, had a better plan. He wanted your mommy to wait, so that I would learn to trust Him and love Him more. He wanted to show me how sinful I could be, how jealous and scared and sad I could be. He wanted me to see better how wonderful Jesus is. Jesus hurt on the cross for me to pay for my sins. Jesus understands when I cry. And Jesus promises to use hard things for good, to make me more like Him. So even though mommy has been waiting for you for a long time, I'm glad that God is loving me and teaching me. I'm glad that I'll get to tell you the story of how I waited for you.

I pray for you daily. I ask God to give you to me soon. I ask Him for a heart to love Him, so that I can love you in a way that pleases Him. I ask Him to call you before your birth, before you even begin to grow in mommy's tummy. I pray that you will understand the gospel and trust in your Savior at a young age. I pray that you will serve Jesus and His church. I pray that you will grow up to be an example of godliness to your friends and family. I can't wait to tell you stories of how great God is and to see you praising Him!

I know that I won't ever deserve you. You are a reward, not for anything I've done, but a free gift from God. I don't know how or when you will come to me, but I'm eager for that day. It is so hard for me to wait for you, but God is helping me. He is changing my heart to love you for His sake, and not for my own sake. I know He will knit you together and give you to me at just the right time. In the meantime, I'll keep praying for you every day.

Love, your mommy-to-be.

2 comments:

The Durbin Family said...

This precious personal letter is a huge encouragement to my faith, and I know someday your child(ren) will count it as a rich inheritence that you and Aaron have grown so much in your own faith through this difficult time, and have steadfastly turned to Jesus...and that you want so dearly to pass that on--what more can we leave our children??

Anonymous said...

Andrea, this is beautiful...baby-to-be (or maybe baby-who-already-is?) will treasure this someday.

It is so encouraging to see you walking forward in faith and trying to submit the hopes and dreams to God. I am praying that you would be filled with joy in what is true!

Sarah